Keep Going (Book 1): The Beginning Page 9
“Chemical warfare.” He uttered.
“I thought the Geneva Convention stopped that from happening?” Petey asked.
“Yeah, that’s done well.” He scoffed at him. “A worthless piece of paper.”
Alex pushed in between the two men. The level of testosterone was overbearing and they were getting no where. She drew the man’s attention to her.
“Who did this?” She asked.
The soldier stood up straight ignoring the pain in his body; he felt the need to prepare for another attack. He saw the broken glass had gone to the floor but there was still a weapon that rested on the woman’s hip. He had no doubt she would use it on him. It was already stained with blood. He sighed giving into their questions.
“Some terrorist group, they figured it was a good idea to bomb all major cities.”
“What do you mean by all major cities?” Alex asked.
The soldier dropped his eyes all instinct to defend was gone as despair filled the room. He didn’t know why but he led them from the corner of the room. Lipping towards a small table off to the other side. They followed cautious of all his movements.
All over the table were maps of different cities, different states and different countries. All those maps were riddled with red stickers, there was so much red. They didn’t need to be told what all the red meant.
“Welcome to the end of the world.” The soldier said.
He wasn’t sure why he said it. He thought that maybe they needed to know that this was really the end. They didn’t need fair tales or false hope, he wanted them to accept the truth, and it seemed they had.
The ginger that protected him, his back hit a wall and slide down. Curling his legs to his chest and dropping his head onto his knees. The blonde, whom he took no really notice of, walked out into the mesa hall. Floating like a ghost, she fell to her knees all light gone from her eyes. He looked at the angry one, the one that had stabbed him and excepted the same result. Instead she stood perfectly still, staring down at the maps. Her face unreadable; he didn’t know what to think of her. He didn’t want to think anymore either. He stumbled past them into the darkness of the shed, might as well get comfortable.
13
“What’re you doing?” Alex asked as she watched Petey rummage through the many boxes that littered the shed. She carried her weapons bag high on her back taking an odd comfort in the weight.
Nothing had changed since the soldier had told them the news. Maggie still stayed kneeled in the center her eyes blank. Petey had finally gotten off the ground and began to poke around. That brought some hope to Alex that meant he hadn’t given up yet.
“Soldier got the right idea.” He muttered not looking back but keeping to his search. “ Got to have another stash around here.”
“Another stash of what?” Alex raised an eyebrow.
No answer was given as he continued his search ignoring Alex in the process. She moved to one of the metal tables and dropped her bag. Sitting on the table she watched her friend search with persistence. She watched as he tore through box after box only finding food or other supplies.
Aggravation took over as his search continued to fail. He started to toss boxes over his shoulder spilling toothpaste or shampoos. He pushed over oatmeal and crackers. He growled at the lack of organization. Gripping one box he readied to throw it believing it to be just more oatmeal, but stopped when it clanked loudly. A beautiful smile grazed his face as he gently laid the box back down and ripped open the folds.
“Knew they’d had more.” He muttered as he raised his prize.
“What the fuck?” Alex jumped up.
Petey snuggled a bottle of vodka like it was his long lost child. A whole box filled sat behind him. She wondered what the purpose was for or why the government had decided to package up liquor. He opened the bottle ready to drown away any thoughts; ready to join the soldier in the pit of despair
It felt like heaven has a drop touched his tongue but only a drop made it out. The rest of it had been taken from him and thrown across the room. He turned to blazing eyes as Alex walked passed him and tipped over the box smashing all of the contents. He screamed. He genuinely screamed in horror as he fell to the ground ready to drink the fallen liquid and shattered glass. His lips almost touching the ground before he was yanked up. The hand that grabbed his hair was unforgiving as she twisted to her will.
Even though he stood taller Alex raised him up as far as she could. He was still bent at the knees connecting once again to the fire that lay behind brown eyes.
“You going to give up? Fine.” She growled before releasing his hair. “At least have some dignity.”
Her face twisted in disgust and anger as she picked up a can of peaches and walked away. His whole life no one had ever made him feel so small. He kneeled next to the puddle of broken glass and liquor.
“Eat something.” Alex dropped the open can of peaches next to the kneeling woman. It was hard to keep up hope with people falling around her. She wanted to blame the soldier but it wasn’t his fault. It sort of was, in the way that misery loved company type of deal.
“They’re dead.” Alex stopped halfway back to the small room. “They’re dead, all of them.” Maggie’s voice was quiet and broken. She turned back to listen to Maggie speak. Not really in the mood to comfort but willing to listen.
“My mom, my dad, my brothers, hell even my cat is dead.” Alex moved back to her and dropped a hand on her shoulder not knowing exactly how to comfort a person in this type of situation. However when Maggie felt the warm hand drop to her shoulder she turned her stare upon Alex. Her eyes had turned cold and dark, it felt like a slap causing Alex to remove her hand and take a small step back.
“She’s dead too, your sister is dead.” Her voice held no emotion.
The urge to comfort left her quicker then it came, anger took home once again but she didn’t say anything. Alex’s lips tightened into a straight line not knowing whether to frown or snarl. She turned away and walked away.
“Eat something.” she threw over her shoulder before entering the small room again.
Alex needed to keep doing something; anything. She grabbed her bag, found a few rags, pipe cleaner and deposited herself at one of the mess hall tables. She wasn’t sure what she was doing at first when she laid out the rag and placed a gun on top of it.
She took it apart; Alex supposed she was cleaning the gun. She remembered the day her sister and stepfather talked about cleaning guns. How they needed to be clean so that they wouldn’t jam or backfire. At the time she had rolled her eyes at their comments now…now she would give anything in the world for their stupid advice.
The metal creaked as another sat across from Alex but she didn’t bother to look up, focusing purely on the gun.
“Did you really have to break all the bottles?” The soldier asked.
His voice was a lot less gruff without the alcohol burn. He folded his hands on top of the table and watched the woman clean with intensity. The soldier thought about how he still didn’t know their names. He should probably ask that but after an aggressive twist from the pipe cleaner his focus turned to the gun. He actually feared for the gun itself and the harsh movements, as she didn’t bother to look at him.
“I’m sure you got another stash hidden away.” She said.
“Fair enough.” He shrugged.
Realizing the man was not leaving any time soon; she finely looked up at him. He sat across from her with the sole purpose to talk, Alex began putting her gun back together. Clicking everything in itself while the soldier watched her hands work with an odd fascination.
“What’s your plan?” He asked after the final piece was placed in the gun. She popped the chamber in a menacing way. A cold chill ran down his back at the way she did things almost distant as if her mind was so far away her body only worked on autopilot. She set the gun down and cracked her neck.
“You said some people survived.” “I didn’t say that at all.” He interrupted.<
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Alex popped her jaw and breathed deep.
“You said they took off in different directions. There is a good possibility that some survived.” She bit her lip reopening the wound. The copper taste was the only constant thing in her life and she savored it. “We’re not dying here. We’re going to get out of here.”
He snorted at her tone it was oddly positive for someone he couldn’t see any emotion in her eyes but then again he wasn’t exactly the best judge of that. Even with the liquor gone from his body, self-pity and guilt still filled him.
“You’re going to….what? Save us all?” He didn’t know why he was mocking the young woman but she didn’t care. Her stance straightened as she put her guns away packing them away and ready.
“I will knock out and carry each one of you on my back if I have to. Don’t doubt me.” She didn’t spare a glance until everything was neatly packed away and folded her own hands, giving the soldier her complete attention.
“I don’t.” and he didn’t. “What if we just want to die here?”
He’s not sure what he expected from her, some reaction or something other then a nod and a sad smile. She opened her bag again and pulled out a revolver opening the empty chamber and putting it between them on the table. She rummaged again through her bag; she pulled out one more item. Leaning forward a single bullet between her thumb and index finger.
“Won’t stand in your way but don’t stand in mine.” She flicked the bullet on reflex he caught it in his hand, feeling like a brick in the center of his palm. Nothing more was said as she left him with his thoughts.
14
Alex walked into the small room swiping off all the contents of the small table. She kicked the maps on the floor out of the way. Petey sat on a hard plastic chair watching as she floated around the room digging through everything. She grabbed several pieces of paper and pens, spreading different maps on the table but he couldn’t see which ones.
“What’re you doing?” He asked, interest growing in her purposeful dance around the room.
“World maps aren’t exactly going to help us. We need to make a plan. Probably avoid high-populated towns and cities. There is a small neighborhood East of here. I think that’s where those monsters came from.” She rambled
Alex put a marker in her mouth as she ran her finger along the map. The soft scraping sound drew him to his feet to see where her fingers were headed. Petey looked down at the city maps and state map her fingers already placing small pins. He hadn’t even notice that she was already pinning things. Alex took the maker from her mouth and stared circling different cities on the state map.
“We know what South is and I’m guessing being hallway to Vancouver we’d find the same thing. West is just water. It’s all terrible, we need to figure out which terrible is the least terrible.” She spoke. “If we take one of the Humvees we saw out there we can get to another town sooner. Who knows we might be able to draw some attention from other survivors or at least give us some of distance from here.”
“Are you kidding me?” Petey muttered.
Alex looked up but he wasn’t even looking at her but his knuckles turned ghostly white as he gripped the table like it was the only thing keeping him up. Confused by the outburst and the sudden shift in energy Alex tried to grab his attention.
“What? What’s the problem? Think the truck will draw too much attention or something?” She dropped her eyes again looking for something she may have missed. Maybe he could see something she didn’t.
“That’s not the problem.” His cold tone brought her eyes up.
“What is?”
“You!” He shouted.
The burst of anger physically pushed her back. She had never seen him this angry. His face filled with anger and blood, his eyes blazing with a new power that left a sick feeling in her stomach. Her friend was gone and here was a man who had lost all sense of control.
“What about me?” She dared ask.
He slammed his hands hard against the table, rattling everything on its surface. He did it again just to get the anger out, anything to get the rage out anything to help not hate her.
“What about me?” She asked again, this time colder.
He looked at her even now she stood like stone. Her shoulders squared and her back straight ready to fight. He chuckled at the innocent tone she conveyed.
“You terrify me.” He spoke honestly. “When you destroyed that radio, I was scared. You had so much anger but then it’s like you checked out. After that nothing seemed to faze you and you just sudden turned into something else.”
Petey tensed more as he placed his hands flat against the table. He fiddled with one of the pins on the maps.
“You kill those things like it’s nothing. You gave a depress man a gun…” Alex opened her mouth to defend her actions but found none. She turned away in shame. “….Charlie is dead and you witnessed it. Yet instead of crying you just kept going. That soldier told you it’s the end of the world and you don’t react. You just keep going and making plans. There is no anxiety or nothing that you have shown since we got here or at the fact that…”
Petey looked away he couldn’t say this to her but he had to. He knew it would hurt her but he wanted to hurt her. He wanted to see emotion on her face, he wanted to know that he hadn’t lost his friend or that she hadn’t lost herself.
“You stay in this delusion that your sister is alive but the truth of the matter is she’s dead.” Petey looked away. “She’s dead and there’s nothing you can do about it.”
“Are you done?” No emotion.
“Yeah, I guess I am.” He uttered and wiped his tears away. He hadn’t even realized he was crying.
“Alex…” His words were stopped by a hard slap across the face making him release his hold on the table and stumble backwards. He rested his hand on his cheek but removed when he felt the tenderness of the skin.
Alex was tensed. Her arms tight by her side and fist clenched. He took another step back instinctively. She looked ready to kill as her eyes shinning with tears but she refused to let them go.
“Fuck you.” Alex growled.
Petey opened his mouth to protest but quickly closed it as the palm of her hand came in contact with his other cheek. Her fury burned brightly like a fire and he was like a moth flying to close. Even though it was him that lit the fire, he feared the burn.
“What makes you think you got any clue what I’m feeling? Or what emotions I do and do not have?” She clenched her teeth. “You have no right.”
He knew he shouldn’t say anything but some stupid part of him still tried. Tried to defend his words. Yet not learning from pervious events when he opened his mouth he received another slap. This one caused him to almost fall to the ground. He looked up a little shocked by the intensity of it.
“You may not be able to see it but I am fucking terrified.” She looked down at the maps. “End of the world is here and instead of fighting you three just give up. Fall to your knees and go willingly.”
“I am all alone right now. I want to cry and scream but I don’t know how to be anything but strong. It’s what I’ve been forced to be my whole life.”
Alex punched the table and pushed off of it. She spun around acting as though she was trying to escape from something. She faced the other side of the room and pulled at her hair. Alex embraced the pain; she knew what to do with pain. She had never been good at emotion but now she felt all of them at once.
Pain, though, she could use that. She could focus on that and turned back to him.
“We were raised to be strong and nothing else. It didn’t matter how tough shit got or how much the world turned on you. No matter what we were taught to fight. Bloody, bruised and broken, you got up. That’s why I keep to my delusions because if I’m still standing so is she. Chris is stronger than me.”
Alex cleared her throat and leaned against the table. Her mind started to clear, her senses opened and she understood. He was scared, simple as that. No
w she needed to make him understand as well.
“I am terrified and worried but I can’t let it take control of me. I have survived so much already, I’m sure as hell not going to let some zombies….yes, and I said zombies beat me.” She stood tall and caught his eyes. “If this really is the end of the world well then I’m going to take out as many of those monsters out with me. I am going to go down in a blaze of glory.”
Petey smiled. She was human and she was the best human ever. Alex replied with a smirk and crossed her arms.
“What about you? You with me?”
“I’m sorry.” He replied.
Alex shook her head and moved around the table to face him. Crossing her arms again she looked him dead in the eye. Her face turned serious but her eyes shined with a small light of humor.
“Don’t want your apology. Want your help. Now are you with me?” She asked again.
This was the Alex he would follow. Not the fearless Alex that she was showing the others but the one that was terrified and furious like them but willing to fight. He nodded. He straightened his back and puffed out his chest.
“Yeah, I’m with you.” He agreed.
“That’s my boy.” She smirked with pride.
15
Petey poured over the maps tracing each path with his fingers. Alex felt less cold as she listened to him speak animatedly about each thought that popped into his head.
“Major problem is still getting out of here. I mean we at least got a fighting chance but right now we’re nothing more than canned tuna.” He scratched his head then folded his long arms. “Those doors create too much noise. The moment we try opening it we’ll get over run before we even have a chance.”
Alex hummed lightly indicating she was listening but kept her eyes on the map. Not that there was anything there that could help but maybe something would. They needed something, a way to get out of this shed. Petey was right, it would be suicide to just try and run through those doors. They needed…